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A Guide To Game Of Thrones Best (And Worst) Running Buddies

We offer some of the best and worst fictitious running partners you can chose from the Seven Kingdoms.

Warning: The following post contains spoilers about Season 7 of Game of Thrones … including Sunday night’s season finale. If you didn’t watch or haven’t watched, consider yourself warned. But go ahead and read anyway, because you’re obviously a runner and a Game of Thrones fan.

We rang in the start of Season 7 back in July with a post about the best places to run in Westeros.

But so much has happened since then. We finally saw the dragons in full-blown action. And it was glorious. But the Night King has one of his own now … setting the stage for what we all hope will be a satisfying series finale when Season 8 debuts.

But that is a long way’s off. And until then, you’re going to want to stay in shape. That means long runs contemplating dragon vs. wight dragon, Jon and Dany’s (ahem, relationship) and where exactly Bran fits into all of this. To also help you pass the time, we offer some of the best and worst fictitious workout partners you can chose from the Seven Kingdoms.

Best training partner

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GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

Easy choice here with Gendry. Not only does he have the stamina to row for years, Jon Snow declared him the fastest of the “North-of-the-Wall-Avengers” who went looking for their very own pet wight to show off in King’s Landing. When the storm brought the army of the dead, it was Gendry, who on fleeted foot, made it back to East Watch to inform Davos to send the raven. Honorable mention to Grey Worm, though the conversation would probably be stilted.

Worst training partner(s)

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GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

Another easy choice here. The army of the dead is a slow-moving horde that will do nothing to push you to a PR. It took them more than two years—two years!—to go from Hardhome to the Wall. Kilian Jornet summited Everest twice in a week. Time to cut them out of your life. Unless you’re going to incorporate some javelin training. Then you can hang with the Night King. Dude has a sick arm.

Best cross-training partner

brienne gif
GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

Brienne of Tarth won’t take your lazy attitude. When you want to reach for the “snooze” button, she’ll smack you down like you were Podrick and come back for seconds. We’ve seen her stamina in action. You’ve got to be in good shape to go toe-to-toe with The Hound and come out on top.

Laziest training partner

drogon
GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

We love her Grace, Daenerys of the House Targaryen, the First of Her Name, The Unburnt, Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men, Queen of Meereen, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Protector of the Realm, Lady Regnant of the Seven Kingdoms, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons. But frankly, we’re out of breath before we’re through saying her name and she never wants to go for a run. She just flies everywhere now. If nothing, she damn sure knows how to make an entrance.

Worst training coach

run rickong gif
GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

Oh, poor Rickon Stark. If only 5Ks, halfs and full marathons were simple straight lines, you might have something to contribute. But most courses require even the gentlest listing in one direction, let alone the ability to move serpentine. Even tracks have slight curves. But your Zoolander-esque inability to turn left … or right, for that matter … led to your untimely end and doomed your run-coach business before it even started.

Funniest running buddy

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GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

Who wouldn’t want to swap stories for 26.2 with Tormund Giantsbane? He’s a ginger quote machine and we’re so glad The Hound pulled him from what appeared to be a cold and icy finish. Who else could deliver motivation like “Walking’s good, fighting’s better, f-ing’s best.” Here’s hoping he and the aforementioned Brienne find their happy ending. And we hope to see him emerge in Season 8 from the melted Wall. Honorable mention to Bronn, who can weave tales of epic travels and is always quick with a joke.

Best/worst tri partner

theon
GIF: HBO/Game of Thrones

We know Theon can swim. He’s Ironborn (Ironman … Ironborn … see what we did there?). The salt flows through his blood. And we know his cardio skills are solid. Fighting a sea battle takes it out of you. But unfortunately, he’s damaged goods. And when things get tough in the 60th mile, he’s more likely to cut and run than help you push through the fatigue. Here’s hoping he gets another redeeming moment (we do give credit for saving Sansa) before his time is up. He took a big step in that direction in the finale. But he’s let us down before. Proceed at your own risk.